You Might Be Transexual If…

Lots of memories from my childhood have been coming back to me at odd moments lately. Not such a surprise really. Here are a few:

• You start wearing you sister’s underwear before starting Kindergarten and know, somehow instinctively, you’d better not let anyone else know. Did my parents discover me at some point and shame me into hiding it? I just don’t remember.
• You dress up in women’s clothes you found stowed in your sister’s old playhouse turned storage shed and get your cousin in trouble by talking him into dressing up with you!
• You try to get your mom to buy you underoos meant for girls, banking on her lack of knowledge of female superheroes to work in your favor. Superman, supergirl…what’s the difference? Ooops! My bad, mom, we better take these back… (sigh)
• You create a “devise” from two chairs, two wire baskets, and some cable that you fantasize will transfer your soul into the body of your unwitting female cousin whom you lure into sitting next to you.
• You pine away in your attic and dream that aliens from the hollow earth (My dad was into some seriously wacky stuff and so was I as a child as a result..) will abduct/rescue you and give you the life you’ve always dreamed of even if that means never seeing another human being for the rest of your life.
• You pray to God that he will give you a woman’s body.
• You pray to God that he will forgive you for wanting a woman’s body. Fasting seems to assuage the guilt AND helps you keep a feminine figure!
• You wish that the “cursed” Girdle of Femininity the sadistic Dungeon Master just tricked your adventuring companion into wearing had been given to you instead.
• You don’t wear your mom’s clothes not because it’s creepy (which it is) but because they are so out of fashion and non-feminine. Your sister’s clothes are fair game though, even though it’s still creepy.
• You steal clothes from your friend’s sisters. (Less creepy, although still creepy.)
• You steal women’s clothes from dryers in laundromats. (A little less creepy but more dangerous!)
• You stay with your friend’s when they watch their sister’s house and finagle your way into sleeping in their bedroom with the door locked (god, I’m good) so you can play dress up all night long.
• You become an expert manipulator and liar so you can get what you need and always cover your tracks.
• You realize as you masturbate you want to be the woman, not the man.

Was I a weird kid or what?

:-)